Overcoming the fear of being Misunderstood

I've been feeling extremely misunderstood lately, especially by people who have known me long enough, not to question my character, despite my behaviour in a particular season.

I was wrong. My expectations were wrong. We expect people to understand all of who we are, but not everyone has the grace to and not everyone was meant to "get" you, and that is okay.

There is also the fact that a lot of people (including friends and family) are committed to a specific version of you that they have created in their minds. They have pinned you to a particular version of who you were and are unwilling to let it go. The truth is though, as humans we are constantly evolving. We are constantly changing our preferences, views and opinions. We are always shifting, moving, unlearning and relearning and not many people understand this.

As a person that is extremely vulnerable with the world about her journey, I am prone to be judged and misunderstood. The moment you open your mouth to share anything about who you are or what you've been through, you give people the room to: condemn, comment, judge and form an opinion of who you are. What I have come to realize, is that sharing is my choice and I need to accept the cons that it comes with.

“People reject what they do not understand.” (Rise Up and Salute the Sun: The Writings of Suzy Kassem)

I have also come to learn that the fear of being misunderstood is directly aligned to the fear of being rejected. Those that do not understand you, may perhaps reject you and that is something that I, all of us, have to come to terms with. The hard truth is that people will always judge you based on an incomplete picture. They will judge you based on a season, an encounter or even an appearance. In the eyes of the world, you are either too much or never enough however, what matters most is who you believe you are.

How do you conquer the fear of being misunderstood? SELF-ACCEPTANCE

Self-acceptance is the key to overcoming the fear of rejection and the fear of being misunderstood. Knowing and understanding that not everyone has to/will like you or accept you, is how you conquer. Learning to own your story and love the parts of yourself that you struggle to accept, is the key to overcoming.

Anesu Michaela Mautsa, a Christian girl with tattoos and piercings, who goes to therapy and shares her mental health journey with the world, I mean, come on, judgement was guaranteed.

The famous quote: “Why fit in when you were born to stand out? (Dr. Suess) will always ring like a school bell in my ears.

I now know and accept that I was supposed to be this strong-willed, vulnerable, firefighter with a tiara on my head.

I am different and that is okay.

I am learning and that is okay too.

I accept myself as I am, whether he/she/they like it or not.

Affirmation of the day: “I am capable of loving all of who I am”.

By Anesu Mautsa